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The Miami Marlins might want to order some special reinforced Gatorade containers. Or whatever brand of liquid they might use in the dugout for the benefit of their players. Of particular concern would be on the days when Carlos Zambrano is pitching.
The Chicago Cubs dealt the right-hander to the Marlins for right-hander Chris Volstad. Oh, and the Cubs reportedly paid all but $3 million of his $18 million salary for 2012. The deal is pending a physical, although some might suggest a mental would be in order, too.
Zambrano’s tumultuous tenure with the Cubs included undergoing anger management. Last season in Atlanta, he walked out on the team and was placed on the disqualified list. The thinking — from the Marlins apparently — is he will be much happier and much less moodier under manager Ozzie Guillen.
There is no question Zambrano has shown talent in his big-league career. If he is able to harness his emotions, he might even be a worthwhile addition for Miami. At the very least, he initially will be a curiosity who might attract fans to the team’s new ballpark in 2012.
Heather Knox will be on "Sports & Torts" -- though sadly not in studio.
In case you were wondering about that photo montage of Heather Knox atop today’s effort, wonder no more. The Playboy Playmate for January will be a featured guest on “Sports & Torts” on Thursday (Jan. 5) at noon (Chicago time) at talkzone.com.
For those who might be unable to view at that time, the program also will be available for later consumption.
Playboy Playmate Heather Knox is always welcome around here.
Not that there has to be any justification for Heather being on the show or to be featured here, but let the record show she is a big Indianapolis Colts. So there actually will be some sports conversation with her, if Heather herself does not have adequate appeal (hard to believe that would be the case).
Other Thursday thoughts:
* Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones says he will not relinquish his additional duties as the team’s general manager. Gee, if you thought anyone who would be aware of the need for a front-office facelift, it would be geriatric Jones.
* Speaking of general managers, Chicago Bears president Ted Phillips says there are a lot of GM candidates who would be proud to work with coach Lovie Smith. Maybe so, but the ones the team should be interested in are the ones who want to have the power to replace Smith with their own choice at coach in a season or two.
* Letting Smith help choose Jerry Angelo’s successor as GM makes about as much sense as those Mike Martz plays that had quarterback Jay Cutler taking seven-step drops as a prelude to being sacked.
* Letting Cutler help pick the Bears’ next offensive coordinator makes about as much sense as Smith helping pick the next GM.
* Still speaking of the Bears, defensive lineman Julius Peppers and running back Matt Forte were at Tuesday’s Bulls-Atlanta Hawks game at the United Center. Peppers exited early, but Forte stayed around to watch the Bulls rally with fourth-quarter offensive heroics. Guessing Peppers was accustomed to poor offensive efforts and could not endure another one — even if this one did occur on a basketball court and not on a football field.
Jaime Edmondson always is welcome around here, regardless of attire.
Speaking of Playboy Playmates (and even if we weren’t), congratulations to Jaime Edmondson (Miss January 2010) — a familiar face (and other body parts) around here. She is the the 2012 Swimgerie SpokesModel and Femme Fatale. To read (or at least gawk at photos) about the news, you can click here. And for those of you who think all this is nothing more than an excuse to run another provacative picture, what can I say? Other than maybe you have been following this site for a while.
Some of us like to think of this as another entry for the Pulitzer Prize for Public Service portfolio (or the cyberspace equivalent, thank you). Yes, and some of us might happen to be slightly delusional. As if that’s a bad thing.
Here is another elliottharris.com favorite, Joanna Krupa, in a Swimgerie video. We will have to wait for Jaime’s (hey, it’s the best we can do on short notice, OK?):
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